In which time moves too fast

"Are we gonna do a mother-son dance?", he asks me on the phone? "I thought we would.", I say and then the tears begin. So here we are trying to come up with a song and every one has me weeping. Not teary...weeping.

When, exactly, did he grow up? Where did that little boy with curls and osh kosh overalls run off to? What happened to the years of catching frogs and playing with tractors and building forts? When did he stop bmxing and skateboarding? When did we stop staying up until one in the morning trying to sort life out together? How did time go by so fast? And for heaven's sake, when did he become another woman's?

We will dance together. My son and I. And then I will blow my nose and smile and give him to my very first daughter. And pretend I was ready.

Midnight thoughts

The God of the universe wants to be our friend. He wants to walk with us and speak to us and direct us in the way of peace. He wants to help us. He loves us so much that he gave his only son. His only son! I have five and I cannot imagine giving even one of them up for anyone or anything. The God who is big and good and powerful wants to be our friend! Why in the world then would we not want to be his? This is what I am trying to understand tonight as I lay in bed not sleeping.

How can the world be that alluring? How can a person spend even one minute in the Presence of the One who loves them and want to go back to the world and it's stink? Where is the power in self or in a sin filled world? It makes no sense. God is so good.

Choice. I know it all comes down to choice. We have to choose Him. We have to choose to walk with Him and accept His love and help and friendship. I think God was very brave to give us free will. It must cause Him so much pain when someone who has known His touch turns and walks alone, when all God wants is to walk with us. Why would we not choose Him? He is so good!

Anyhow, after wandering around in my thoughts and emotions tonight, I have to say that choice or free will aside, I believe in the power of intercession. I refuse to stand idly by and allow the god of this world steal what belongs to the True and Living God. So, as hard as it is to understand a wandering heart or a bad choice...as much as it hurts to see someone I love in the muck, I will pray. And I will gather other prayers and we will storm heaven and we will see the captive set free. Because God is good. And I believe that!

In which I appease my faithful followers

Well, as usual, I have gone forever between posts. It isn't that nothing is happening. The trouble is that so much is happening all the time, that I rarely make writing here a priority. However, of late, I have received criticism from some of my dear followers (read my mom and my uncle) for my lack of diligence, so in an effort to keep the dear ones happy, here we go.

On my mind lately has been the passing of time. Michael and I will be married twenty-five years in a few weeks. I have a twenty two year old son about to get married. I just went for a mammogram. I frequently have this odd feeling that I am living in a dream. I do not feel old enough to be married twenty-five years, have a son about to be married or for heavens sake, need to go have mammograms. It all feels strange to me. I tell myself to really live each day, as they are passing so fast, but then at the end of the day I wonder if I did. Time. Fleeting, moving, never stopping, stealing from me if I let it. "Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom." Psalm 90:12

There is more that could be said, however in an effort to not overwhelm anyone, I shall just give you a bit of this and that at one time.

Family and Friends

There really is something special about people with whom you share a history. We spent a busy weekend with dear friends of many years, and it was very special. We were all here. All the kids who aren't really kids anymore, all the new littles and even the new significant others, one husband and one soon to be wife. And Joe. You can't forget Joe, because Joe has been a part of our gatherings since the beginning. What a joy to have friends who are really family. People who know you and honestly love you. People who can get in the fridge and help themselves and who you can ask to go out to the garage fridge for the chicken or salad and they just do it. Family. Family is the dearest word and sweetest feeling. God is good!

I love these little sweeties

Yesterday, I kept the little sweeties for a few hours. I was very nervous about having Natalie, as she is pretty attached to her Mama. Nolan and Myles are good friends and play happily together. But the girlie had me worried. No need. She was wonderful. It certainly helped to have Nolan here for a bit of familiarity, but she seemed pretty content to be held by her Auntie Michele. Towards the end of their stay, I rocked her to sleep. I have to admit to a tad bit of wishing she was mine. She sure was a sweetheart sleeping on me in her little purple outfit. I had forgotten how nice a sleeping baby can feel. And, maybe, just maybe, a little girl feels even better. There is just nothing like it. Auntie Michele loves Natalie Ruth and Nolan Matthew! God is so good!

In which I share a lot of randomness

Well, I see my blog is finally working right again. Zac and I tried to figure it out when it was screwy, but we couldn't, so I gave up trying. Apparently Google fixed the problem. Glad to see it.

I am absolutely loving this early spring. The lawn and flower gardens are all raked. The apple trees are pruned. The grubex has been spread on the lawn. Oh, how I hope it works! And...I have planted lettuce, radishes, chives and onions in my garden. Oh, sweet happiness! Playing in that warm dirt brought such immense joy. Michael has promised me three more garden boxes. That will be eight total. I get goose bumps just thinking about it. I started my own tomatos and peppers this year. We shall see how that works out. Oh, and I have four blueberry bushes to plant! I am so happy!

We had a lovely Easter brunch here this year. Just the family. It was so fun to see Myles and Nolan playing together all day. Nolan is a real person now, not just a baby, so they had great fun outside together. I think Myles enjoys being older than someone. He is very kind to Nolan.

School is plugging along. It has been a good year. Myles is finally reading pretty well, so everything is easier. Even math requires reading, so he is able to work much more independently now. Don't get me wrong, I still sit there and help him quite a bit, but if I need to go do something, he can work along at things. Being able to read directions makes a big difference.

Marcus keeps right at his work. He is very independent and quick to learn new concepts. He has actually gone off to visit Gabe for a week here and there and just taken his school work with him and stayed on top of his lessons. He is great friends with Gabe now, so this has been a lot of fun for him.

Well, enough randomness for now. I am glad to be back with a working blog. Perhaps I shall even post now and then. God is good!

Like Merchant Ships

According to my excel spread sheet, so far this year I have spent $1,157.14 on groceries. I have saved exactly $807.12 using coupons. That averages out to only spending $128.57 a week. That's not too bad for a family of six Monday through Thursday and eight plus Friday through Sunday. I am off to Price Chopper tomorrow to save and stockpile. I suppose that is the modern day definition of Proverbs 31:14. It is also a frugal homemakers definition of fun!